Many Marine Corps spouses get asked that question time and time again. So how do you do it? My philosophy is, “I’d rather have it and not need it than need it and not have it.”
This statement can apply to attaining knowledge and wisdom in almost all aspects of the Marine Corps wife lifestyle. Whether the concerns are giving birth for the first time at the Naval Hospital, deployments, starting a new business, finding a job, retiring, communication or navigating things in the Marine Corps the route is typically the same for many of us.
Be proactive, not reactive
Find out your moving in two months? Don’t depend or wait on the Marine Corps or other people to help you along the way. Research and look into the city, school district ratings, take a TMO class, etc. We are all allowed to have our bummed out moments since change means leaving the familiar but watching Lifetime reruns maybe isn’t the best way to prepare for an expedited move. Dwelling doesn’t make the move go away so try and embrace it with open arms and view it as a glass half full… of your favorite wine I mean.
You can redefine your entire life if you realize it’s up to you and how you perceive life. A spouse is to be a partner, team mate and soul mate but realize you also have the power to build up or destroy the others spouse’s emotional and mental well-being. If you start to get down in the dumps realize no one is perfect and life could be so much worse so check your perspective often and keep it on the positive side as much as possible.
If you’ve been struggling on this forefront you’re not alone. Many couples have this issue whether Marine Corps couples or not. Just try to listen and not react in your head or out of your mouth before your spouse is even finished. Communication isn’t about who wins it’s about understanding and really listening to the other person and respecting them even if you don’t necessarily agree. Don’t make hasty decisions in the heat of the moment. If you’re disagreeing it’s ok to take a time out to try again when you’ve both cooled off. Also realize once words are spoken they can never be taken back.
What do you do for you?
New and seasoned wives alike tend to focus solely on the husband, kids, bills, car maintenance, after school activities, weekend plans, meal planning, couponing, travelling, summer camp, visiting relatives, shopping, working, gossiping, and on and on. Don’t forget “you” in all of that. Remember that this life can get tedious and very overwhelming. So don’t forget about you. Go to Zumba, get a massage, take a long, quiet bubble bath, empower each other and recharge your batteries.
It’s commendable to think about others and juggle this Marine Corps lifestyle we all so love and love to hate and hopefully these tips will have folks asking you, “How do you do it?”
For more tips follow my blog!